My name is Bob, I'm young, female (yes.. I'm a tom boy), gorgeous, single, gorgeous, loving and gorgeous. I live with my mum Gillan (useless, toothless, violent and deranged), my sister Hogan (fat and psychopathic), a Pugwash type creature Holly (mental) and two staff, one male and one female.

Now that Pugwash has moved on it's time for me to step into the limelight. I'm going to be telling you about stuff that interests me, squeaky noises, small fast moving twitchy things, tuna... in fact everything that's Bob's Business. Right. Let's get this show on the road.

As I am a skilful, stealthy, streamlined and ferocious feline I like to reward my staff with gifts of the rodent variety. Recently, having captured a particularly juicy specimen, I deposited it in the females shoe for her to find later. She didn't discover my offering for a couple of weeks but, when she did, her shrieks of joy could be heard miles away. The tiny white wrigglers that were now accompanying my present only added to her excitement. I wonder where they came from?